Thursday, December 27, 2007

Perm Plan

or should I say "Child and Family Team Meeting" (minus the child as they are not allowed to attend). What a dumb name...anyways...

for the first time this meeting lasted 1 1/2 hrs when it is supposed to last 30 minutes. I had a page of notes on each kid. I felt bad that everything on the list was negative but that is life right now. Unfortunately, there really isn't anything positive to say about either kid.

So here's the jist of what was decided:

1. I need to call the clinic and get JP in for a med checkup.

2. I need to call the office where Emilee goes and try to get JP in to see the same psychiatrist that Emilee is scheduled to see Jan 15.

3. I need to call the respite home where the kids went in Nov and see if they will agree to watch the kids everyother Sat or Sun for the day to give us a scheduled break and so it's part of the routine for the kids.

4. N, our partnership program lady, will set up a meeting for the end of Jan with the "team" and include the school and psychiatrist.

5. I need to fill out some form to see if we can get some more money for the kids on a monthly basis. (Before anyone jumps on me...we DO NOT do this for the money. The point in this is that I am in jeapordy of losing my job from being gone so much. These kids are a lot of work and if we can get more of a monthly subsidy for them, I can easier afford to quit my job before I am fired. In NOV I was gone 14 days from work. In Dec (not counting my meeting today or the kids' dentist appts on Monday) I have had 16 days with appts from being gone anywhere from 2 1/2 hrs to all day.

6. I have been told to check into PATH as that would get us more money and more support/training for dealing with the kids' behaviors and again allow for me to possibly be a SAHM and be free to run them to their MANY appts on a daily basis. This would also add another case worker to my already long list.

7.Hubby and I need to discuss whether we want a case aide (i.e. Path Parent) to take Emilee for a few hours a few different days a month for another sort of respite care.

8. Hubby and I need to discuss if we want intensive in home therapy (ummm when would this fit into our schedule??? I have no clue). This would be another appt on my calendar even though they would come in the evenings to our home...when??? We get home at 6:30-7:00pm and the kids are in bed at 7:30pm???

9. Transportation help was talked about. Our county won't do it because the kids are not from this county. THey want the kids' county to pay our county in order to do it and even then our county kids would take precidence (?sp) over my kids. AKA...they wouldn't ever help anyways and the transportation lady is old and I really can't stand her would this really be a help to me??? NOt sure.

10. There is a child psychiatrist that would be good for the kids to see vs the one here in town. The prob...this psych is 60 miles away so that's more time off work and more time in the vehicle burning $3.00/gal gas and getting a wopping $30 reimbursement from MA for each trip. That barely pays the gas let alone any wear and tear on my vehicle or lost wages, etc. Something we are supposed to talk about as a couple. (Yep another thing for ME to do)

11. Adoption was discussed. I made it VERY clear that there will be NO DISCUSSION on adoption for a LONG time. There are FAR TOO MANY issues with these kids and if ADOPTION is what they want in the near future, they need to move these kids. Adoption discussion was dropped! (What does that tell you...they know they would have a hard time finding a home to take these kids)

There were a few other minor things discussed as well. Did you notice that a lot of things were things that I need to take care of? Yep, thanks for all the support!


noswimmers said...

Oh much to deal with. I don't know where you find the time. Hopefully hubby can take a few things off your to-do list.
Good luck!

Yondalla said...

Ain't that the way it goes...

Mary said...

Take it little by little. Prioritize those things that are important to you and try to do those first. Gradually work your way through the list, even if it takes several weeks. At least you're getting things done but not killing yourself in the process. And again, can hubby help with some of it?

Julie said...

I don't think anyone you invited here will criticize you for getting more money for these kids- they are definately not "basic" needs kids and would probably do better if you could stay at home with them but that is a big decision and task- make sure that is what you want before you quit your job over it- but I guess you don't love your job either so that maybe the answer. I would make that priority number one- get that stipend raised- get respite set up and the set up what ever counseling/ classes you think will really help you all- that is just my 2 cents- You need to take care of yourselves or you will be worth nothing to them anyway. I think you are doing a great job with them to date- they are tough kids and you are still in the game with them- you are great!

Kathy said...

I've had to catch up with your blog, Trace's blog and Angie's blog! I'll have to try to catch up with everyone else's soon too. I'm very glad that you sent me an invite, since you went private. I totally understand not wanting people IRL reading much of what's in a blog.

I'm SO sorry that things are so stressful and hard, but I'm glad that you're on your way to getting some help with all of it. I honestly don't know how you do it all. I have a tough enough time with Destiny. I know it's got to be very hard and very depressing for you, and I hope that going to therapy will be a big help and relief for you.

You are awesome! Remember that! Also remember that you've got people thinking of you and praying for you.


Trace said...

Oh Jodi... What a weight you are carrying. I'm so sorry. All I can say is think seriously about how you want to handle the situation. As of now, you don't want to adopt them. I can't imagine you're so altruistic that you want to wreak havoc at your job and your emotional & physical health.