It's been so good lately....

and then it had to change. I guess I knew better than to think things could go on forever as well as they were.

Did you know i beat my daughter??? Really I didn't, but that is what she told her teacher on Wednesday. She came home from school sick on Tuesday. I don't believe for one minute that she was really sick but the school said she had been complaining of a sore throat, headache and her ear hurting so I went and got her. There were already 7 kids sick in her class alone so chances were, she was not feeling up to par. Before we ever got home, she asked if she could lay on the couch and watch cartoons all day. I told her "No, when you are sick, you need to rest in your room". She was NOT happy. but that's what she did. I don't think she's be "sick" again any time soon! :-)

Then Tues night she didn't like that JP got to stay up later than her (he only stayed up until normal bedtime but since she was "sick" she went to bed early.)

Then Wed morning she was a horrible bearcat! She was pokey at EVERYTHING and after 20 minutes I told her she was done with breakfast even though she had only eaten about 1/3 of her poptart. Too bad...you'll be hungry by lunch time. Then we had a team meeting at noon on Wed and Em's teacher was there and filled us all in on her claims from the morning. I asked if she looked "Beat UP". Her teacher said NO. Em also said i pushed her and she bumped her knee. I asked if she had a bruise. her teacher said yes but it was greenish-yellow already...not a fresh black & blue mark so she knew it wasn't true. UGH! This kid!

We had a LONG talk last night. I'm not sure that it did any good. Actually, from the report that I got from uncle S today, it didn't do any good but that's a whole different story.

Anyways, we'll see how our night goes tonight.

I Love where I live, I Love where I live, I love where I live

Ok, I hope you all figured out that was meant to be sarcastic.

40 degrees yesterday. Today the windchill is -40 degrees. That's absolutely CRAZY!!! I actually wish we would have gotten the snow that some places north of here got. At least then, I could have stayed home today!

Emilee

The school called (I'm not surprised).

School : Emilee isn't feeling too good. She thinks she can make it the rest of the day but wants to know if she can go home with Uncle S instead of going to the Afterschool program.

Me: Well I really think she should go to the afterschool program.

School: I'll let you talk to Emilee.

Emilee: Hi mom (sounding VERY sick)

Me: Hi Sweetie. What is going on?

Emilee: I have a headache.

ME: But you think you can make it the rest of the day at school?

Emilee: Yeah I think I can. But Mom, can I PLEASSSSSSSSSSSSSE go home with Uncle S tonight instead of going to Afterschool.

Me: Well I think you should just go to AS. Tell B that you aren't feeling too good and that you would like to just rest when your homework is done. If you go to Uncle S's house then you'll have to be outside helping with chores and etc and if you're not feeling good, that's not a good idea. You can get some rest at the AS program.

Emilee: Ok mom. Bye. I love you!

Me: Love you too Sweetie. See you tonight.


Ok, so I could have let her go to Uncle S's house tonight but when she asked this morning, I told her she needed to go to the AS program. I'm such a mean mom!

So innocent

Last night 7:15pm...

Hubby & I were sitting on the couch watching tv and Emilee came to the couch.

Emilee: I don't want to go to school tomorrow.

HUbby: Well you don't get a choice. You have to go to school tomorrow. It's MOnday.

Emilee: Mom, can I cuddle.

Me: Sure, crawl up here.

Fast forward to 10:45pm...I'm just dozing off in bed and here someone coughing on the other end of the house. I just lay there for a little while. Then here people talking. Roll over to tell Hubby that HIS kids are awake and he's not in bed. It's him talking to Emilee (guess I must have been a little more than dozing as I didn't notice him get out of bed). By this time I hear her throwing up but figure he's up..he can handle it.

Hubby coming back to bed: YOUR daughter just threw up.

ME: Convenient when she said earlier that she didn't want to go to school tomorrow.

Hubby: You don't know she's faking it.

ME: WHatever (roll over and go back to sleep).

Fast forward to this morning. I wake JP up and then go to wake Emilee up.

Emilee (walking into the kitchen): Mom I puked last night.

ME: Yeah, that's what daddy said. What was wrong?

Emilee: My tummy hurt from being hungry (Ok she ate supper at 6:30pm and had desert...she wasn't THAT hungry!)

ME: Oh that's not good.

Emilee: So am I going to school today?

ME: Yep. (Feeling her forehead) You don't feel warm or anything and it was only one time. Here I'll make you some toast for breakfast.

Emilee: Can I have a poptart?

ME: Well, just incase you are still feeling a little sick, let's just have toast this morning and see how that goes.

Emilee: Oh, ok.

She ate her breakfast and drank a full glass of milk. Perked up and couldn't wait to get to school....Now was she really sick or did she make herself throw up in hopes of getting to stay home today??? I'm not sure but I can make a guess.

A Prayer Request

Ok, I don't do this much and I wouldn't do it if I didn't think it was truely necessary. Although I do have my beliefs, going to church every Sunday is not something that we do. I would like to go more often than we do, but that is a whole different post for another day.

A co-worker of mine who is 33 yrs old was put in ICU last Sat with a bleeding ulcer. He recieved 3 units of blood upon admission. He was in ICU until Tuesday when he was released to come home. By Tuesday night he was back in ICU and has received 2 more units of blood since then. A scope was done on Wed to cauterize (?sp) the ulcer (again). He had a colonoscopy yesterday and they found 2 pollups and sent them in to the lab. He called me here at work yesterday and he doesn't sound very good. He's very weak. They can't find where he is still bleeding from! I'm scared. He and I have developed a very close friendship and I consider him one of my best friends. He is married with twin step children (age 11). He has 2 boys (age 12 and 10) of his own that do not live with him. His wife is my back-up daycare provider. It's just so scary to think this could be happening to someone who is in such good physical shape. He coaches 7th grade boys and girls basketball, is training for cage fighting (ok - maybe he's not so smart! LOL). Anyways, please keep him and his family in your thoughts.

No Swimmers tagged me...


Here are the rules:

1) Link to the person that tagged you.
2) Post the rules on your blog.
3) Share six non-important things/habits/quirks about yourself.
4) Tag at least three people at the end of your post and link to their blogs.
5) Let each person know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.
6) Let the fun begin!

1. I go to bed by 8pm at the latest in the winter time! Yep sometimes BEFORE my kids!
2. I'm far from a neat freak at home. Although I LOVE it when my house is clean...I can't seem to get up the energy to do ANYTHING these days...(Maybe that has something to do with what is going on in my life right now..who knows?)
3. I pick at my fingernails (I'm not a biter..just a picker!) :-)
4. I'm a compulsive shopper at Maurices!
5. I really don't know how to put on makeup! SOrry - I've always been a "tom boy" sort of girl. My sis has tried teaching me, but I just really don't get the jist of it!
6. I have run over 3 of my own kittens in the past 2 years! I'm such a bad "mom".

Okay...I tag:
1. Trace
2. Kathy
3. Little Did I Know

I'm still here

Wow...it's been a whole week since I last blogged...what do i do with my time???? Ha Ha.

I don't know where to even begin and frankly, I don't have time to begin right now. Just know we are still alive...we are ok....and we are TRYING to stay warm!

Oh....and I did back out of official respite last weekend...however, I DID get a night out with the girls last Friday night (yep 1 beer and I was toasted! - I NEED to get out more) and then on Sat I was able to go to a Lia Sophia Premier deal in Fargo so that was nice. The kids' spent the night with Hubby's dad and brother. They didn't come home until 6pm on Sat! :-) I was actually missing them by the time they got home! It was SOOOOO nice though!

There is other stuff to report but that will have to wait.

Anything exciting in your lives???? Email me as I haven't even been lurking on your blogs for the past week!

Lia Sophia Party

Hi. I'm having a Lia Sophia Party. Anyone want to check out the website???? Here it is....

www.liasophia.com/shoptj

I NEVER have good turn out at these parties so thought I'd put it out there to all of you. IF anyone wants to order anything and you feel comfortable enough...I will ship it to you for free!

*****************
On the home front...things are ok. Emilee is doing GREAT still. JP - that's a different story but he starts therapy tomorrow. I had a LONG talk with the sw today. We'll see what happens.

I'm doing ok. Bummed today because the weather forecast for this weekend is not nice. 6 degrees BELOW zero for a high on Sat! The kids are supposed to go to respite for the first time this weekend but I really can't see taking them out in that weather when it's only to give me a break. It's just not safe and yet...I NEED A BREAK! We'll see what happens.

Weekend Update

Emilee had a GREAT weekend! I'm not knocking on wood but NO ISSUES since last Thursday! No talking back...no mood swings...nothing. I LOVE BEING A PARENT!!

JP - well he's a whole 'nother issue and this is a positive post so we'll leave it at that!

I have my 2nd appt with my therapist at noon today. :-)

So how was your weekend?

Not sure about this...

Online Payday Loans

I got this from a fellow blogger. Not sure how this figures things but here's what it came up with. Go figure.

This was an email that I was in my inbox when I got to work today. It's from Emilee's teacher.


Sorry, another bad day. We were putting our things away before lunch and
she had her pencil box on the floor as she was putting things into it.
Suddenly I heard this scream come from her direction and she suddenly
stomped on her pencil box and broke it. When I questioned her, she said
that it pinched her finger and she was angry. I said that it was likely
an accident in which she should take some of the responsibility for since
she was the one who had closed it into her finger. It was not a good way
to display our anger, especially not in front of the students because she
did make a big scene over it. She began to cry because the box was
broken, but calm down quickly when we changed our activity. She also had
five minutes in from recess for not listening. She was more concerned
with her shoes and whether they were fastened perfectly and would not keep
her feet on the floor. Then she got up in the middle of class to pick all
the rocks out of them and refused to sit back down until she was finished.
We talked about the fact that there are better times to do things like
this and during instruction time is not one of them. The afternoon was
better before she left. Hope you have a better night.


Just a normal day in school for her. I think she will be buying her own new pencil box.

Still Alive & Kicking (litterally)

Well I'm still alive. Things are ok. I don't want this to be a negative post so I'm going to try my darndest to keep it somewhat positive.

The weekend went ok. Nothing major so that's a plus. Meltdown free? NOT! But not anything that we couldn't handle.

Monday - Em tried running away. I had to chase her down to catch her! :-( I have SEVERE exercise induced asthma that is made even worse by cold air. By the time I caught up to her (that little fart can run!) I was huffing and puffing BIG TIME! We made it back to the house and between gasping for air I was able to explain to her that Mommy's lungs don't work right and that I was VERY sick right then. She had a scared look on her face. I didn't care. Maybe telling her that wasn't good - maybe she'll run again cause she knows I can't chase her like that again or maybe it was good and scared the crap out of her and she won't do it again. Either way - I told her so who cares. STill today I'm having trouble getting a deep breath and coughing A LOT. Oh the fun of asthma!.....................JP well, he was JP getting ready for school. Or should I say NOT getting ready for school. I dressed him AGAIN. He cussed at me for not letting him dress himself and so on. Same old story, just a new day.

Tuesday - Em apologized for her behavior on Monday. Forgot her glasses at home and the school called. She got upset when I said I wouldn't go get them and take them to her (remember I work 30 miles North from home and her school is 10 miles W of our house) but soon got over it when I told the school that she had gone 3 days during vacation and did fine.....JP - same story...new day.....also bath night. Emilee took her own shower as she normally does. Listened when I told her there wasn't time to play because we needed to eat supper and got done quickly :-). JP - battle battle battle. He has recently begun HATING his showers/baths. He SCREAMS, CRIES, HITS, KICKS, you name it , he does it in the shower. He complains the water is hot even when we have the hot shut off and only have cold on to try and show him the difference between hot and cold. He also says he has to go potty. (He goes BEFORE he gets in the shower). The first time (last Wed night) I let him out to go. He never went. Sunday night Hubby let him out to go. He never went. So last night I told him he needed to stand up and cooperate so that we could finish washing his hair and then he could get out and go potty. He didn't cooperate. Eventually (20 minutes later) we finally finished his shower (Em's took her 8 minutes). He got dried off and sat on the toilet because he had to go Potty SOOOO BAD. 5 minutes later and no tinkling and I made him get off the toilet and get his jammies on (it's now approaching 8:15pm and he normally goes to bed at 7:30). He cried and screamed while I dressed him in his pj's and put him to bed still complaining that he had to go potty. He fell asleep and woke up this morning dry....Now am I wrong for not believing him that he had to go potty????

Wed - Emilee had a good morning (remembered her glasses!). Apologized again for Monday and asked me a few more questions about not being able to breathe. Jp - same story...new day. This time I set up my camcorder to see what it was he did in his room instead of getting dressed. After 25 minutes I went in and dressed him. Then watched the tape. He just stands there looking around. He didn't play with toys. He didn't lay back down in bed. He just stood in the middle of the floor looking around.


We started a new med for JP last Sat. It's a new patch for ADHD. Not sure what the drug name is right now. His mood has seemed worse to me. The school reports that he is doing better (still VERY pokey) but seems a little quicker and is more verbal. He was able to sit at the table and do his homework alone last night. I didn't have to sit and walk him thru it step by step. That is an improvement. So is the mood just a coincidence or is it a side effect? I'm waiting for the clinic to call me back.

Em has to have her liver checked today due to her meds. That should be fun! NOT! She's such a drama queen. Maybe I'll make a deal with her....not exaggerate at the clinic and we can have a treat between that appt and her therapy? We'll see if she'll bite on my deal! :-)

So that's my life in a nutshell for the past 5 days. I'm here. I'm worn out. I'm stressed. Just a normal week in the Hubby and Jody household.

My new friend IRL

Today I was able to meet a blogger friend for lunch. IRL! When I started this blog I never thought I would "meet" anyone that would live close enough to me to actually meet them IRL. At this point, my blogger friend will remain anonymous until this person tells me that it's ok to say who this person is. We had a great lunch and a great conversation. And the best part...there is a light at the end of my tunnel. I know things are different with every kid, but there was a light at the end of this person's tunnel and it does give me hope that there will be one for us too.

Thank you new IRL friend! And we SOOOO have to get the kids' together some weekend.

Therapy Thoughts

I think I am really going to like my therapist. First impression was very good. Not only does she work within the local school district so she deals A LOT with kids, she has been thru infertility herself! She asked a lot of questions to make me think and made me give her answers which I think is good. It hurt a lot to say stuff out loud but I think it also helped me. One question that I struggled to answer was, "When was the last time you were Happy?" I don't know. We have another appt scheduled for next week. She also got me to admit out loud that I am struggling with my eating disorder again. I know the road I'm headed down (with the anorexia) but I can't change it on my own. She understands. I do feel better now than I did earlier today. She gave me some "homework" to complete before the next appt.

1. Call my MD and discuss meds with him.
2. Make an effort to get at least 3 hrs/week alone with Kenny...NO KIDS!
3. Do something special for MYSELF within the next week. (I think my lunch out to meet my blogger friend tomorrow should count for this! I'm SUPER excited.)
4. Admit I'm only HUMAN and not SUPERWOMAN! (There I already have that one done!)

Overall, I'm happy with how things went. There now next time when she asks when I was last happy I can tell her TODAY! after my appt. Well I'm not happy in a giggling kind of way but I am relieved that I am taking steps to feel better about myself...the kids...me and Hubby's relationship...life in general.

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU to my blogger friends for supporting me and listening (reading). For those of you who recommended therapy...THANK YOU.

(See a post without a bunch of negatives!! This has to be a first in a LONG TIME!)

What I hate most right now

is being told "You are such a strong person for sticking by Emilee and JP. They are so lucky to have you". Yeah well I'm tired of being that strong person IRL. Life sucks at home right now and I'm not handling it well at all! Guess what ...I'm HUMAN and I'm not as strong as everyone thinks.

1st therapy appt in 1 hr and 21 minutes.

Therapy today

Dr Therapist - Emilee draw me a picture of your family.

Emilee draws a pic of hubby & JP.

Dr Therapist - Emilee draw me a picture of anything.

Emilee draws a pic of a storm.


Hmmmm...interesting.