Monday, August 20, 2007

Finally some time off

Well after 44 hours being put in between last Monday thru Thurs I was not a happy camper. I left my house at 6:30am last thurs and got home at 10:05pm thurs night. YUCK! Needless to say when I got to work on Friday morning I told the boss how I was feeling. He told me to leave at 11:00. :-) It was about 11:40am when I finally got outta here but it was a nice break. I ended up going to visit my sister & her family and brother & his family for the night. We had a good time for the most part.

Sis's hubby stayed home and watched the kids while her and I went out for a while on Friday night. Not like we could do much but it was nice to have an adult conversation without the interruption of a kid telling me they just want a hug! She did ask me to be there when this baby is born in about a month. I have mixed feelings about this. I wanted to be there when my niece was born last Nov and sis wouldn't let me. Then she let one of her students be there! {{GROWL}}. She knows that one of my friends has asked me to be there when their baby is born in Feb and I get the feeling that the only reason sis is asking me is because either A. My mom has told her she needs to or B. she feels guilty that a friend is going to let me and she didn't want to. Either way, I really don't want to be there. Plus I am gone to a school for work Sept 10-14 and sis is planning on being induced on the 20th. 1. Thurs are my late night so that won't work and 2. I can't ask for a day off right after being gone for a whole week. Deep down I think sis knows this too and that's why she asked...she knew I couldn't make it work. UGH! Why do I feel this way?

We came home Sat afternoon and that was plenty of time. Sis & hubby are building a new house to the toon of $300K. Yep they are rolling in the bucks and like to flaunt it. Brother & family just bought a new house but it's not NEW in that sense. Just new to them. I actually like Brother's house better. It's more my style but that is also becuase it's outside of town and they have some privacy. ALthough they have neighbors , they still have a yard and it's not like you can reach out your bedroom window and touch your neighbors house like you can at sis's house. Ok so Maybe I'm exaggerating a little but I know there isn't 15 feet between the houses! YUCK! I'm a country girl and guess I always will be.

Sis and I went out to the county fair for a while and holy cow - I think I need to drink some Aberdeen water! Talk about Preggers people EVERYWHERE!!! ;-p. That probably put a damper on my mood too.

I have talked with a fellow blogger who I won't name for confidentiality reasons and I want to say a GREAT BIG THANK YOU to this person for her help. Hubby and I are really having some issues accepting parenting on a long term basis to Em & JP. Don't get me wrong, they are great kids, but we need to HONESTLY look at all options before we can make a life-long committment to them. (I feel like such a bad person right now!) Thanks to this fellow blogger, we are going to make a profile and submit it to some infant adoption sites and see what happens. Deep down, I know this is what I want. This is what we both wanted when we started this journey. To start our family with an infant. After that, we both said we would be open to older adoptions. Now we're staring down the road of older adoptions and wondering "WHAT IF???" I feel so lost.

To be honest somedays it is even hard to read fellow bloggers blogs' who have infants in their homes and who get daily calls for younger kids. In our county, it is so screwed up. There are so many kids out there who need to be put in foster care for safety reasons.....neglect, drugs, abuse, etc and yet our county doesn't want to get involved so the kids stay in these homes. Then when they kids are teens/late pre-teens they pull them from the home and can't figure out why they can't find a foster home to take them. They have WAY TOO MANY ISSUES than what we have training / support for. Had they pulled them at a young age and forced the families to get the help they desperately needed, this could have been avoided in most (not all) cases. At least the parents would have been forced to either 1. clean up their act 2. give up their rights. Whether their was other family suitable or an adoptive home, these kids deserve so much more.
I'm not sure how your counties work or how close some of you are with your workers, but if there is EVER an infant that can't be placed and there is an option of placing out of state...please email me and I will give you my contact information. mom just called. My niece is now in the hospital. She was sick this weekend when we were down there visiting. Guess her temp is still running between 101 - 104 degrees F. Her WB count is way up too and she's been on antibiotics since last Friday. Plus now she is dehydrated. Poor thing!

Mom also told me that she has to have arthroscopic knee surgery sometime in the near future. She's been having knee problems for a while and nothing is seeming to help it so she finally went to a specialist. I told her to set up the appt! and not wait. She needs to get this fixed! She just laughed at me and told me she was too busy! Guess me and daddy will have to have a talk!

Not much else knew. JP turns 5 on Wed so we are planning a party for him this Sat. Not a lot of people, but should be fun. Hopefully we have nice weather so we can be outside.


Kathy said...

I'm glad that you got a much needed break from the long hours at work, as well as some adult time too!

I can truly understand you and your dh having to re-evaluate what you want to do about being parents...stick with adopting the older children, or go for the infant adoption. I can also really understand the feeling that you want to adopt an infant first, and then adopt older children after that.

I also understand how it can be hard to read other blogs about other ladies who have adopted infants. It's like you're truly happy for them, but you're also sad for yourself. It's understandable, and normal.

I'm so glad that you guys are pursuing what you feel in your hearts is right for adding to your family. Don't feel bad about it either. I know it's hard, especially with the two little one's you've got with you now, but sometimes things work out in different ways...and it's better to know now rather than later.

Good luck to you! Keep us updated!

Susan said...

How close are you to another county? In our state we can take out of county kids because two of the counties bordering us have very limited resources. There are some other things you can do to up your chances of getting an infant placement too. Does your state offer an Options For Recovery program?

Susan said...

Jody, I can't find your email so email me if you want more ideas.