Another appt at the EDI this morning. This time with the MD. She says I'm on a trend they don't like to see....(AKA - I'm still losing weight.) Since my first appt 3 weeks ago today, I have lost 4 1/2 lbs. Since my appt last week I have lost 1 1/2 lbs. The sad thing is that I LIKE IT! I found myself smiling when she told me that. I start seeing the psychiatrist weekly next week. The dietician biweekly. The md - monthly unless necessary more often. She said she will give me 3 1/2 more lbs to loose before we need to make some drastic changes (i.e. inpatient treatment). I looked at her and laughed...and just where does she think that fits in MY schedule????? I know I need to take care of myself and it really scares me to think about how happy I was that the scale had went down yet again. This is A LOT harder than I thought it would be. I went into treatment thinking that with someone else to talk to who truly understands, I could lick this thing in a hurry. That is not how things are working out and it's frustrating to me. I feel like all I've done for 3 days is eat and yet I've still lost 1 1/2 lbs. I'm GOING CRAZY! I walked out of the clinic this morning with another girl. We were making small talk about how long we had been going to the EDI and the whole time I was thinking....man I wish I was as skinny as you are! She was only about 5 feet tall though so I know that makes a difference (I'm 5'10") but still. Why am I so fixated on this this time? I just don't understand. Hubby actually sounded concerned when I talked to him after the appt today. I told him that I had lost another 1 1/2 lbs and see said, "But you have been eating better. Is there anything else wrong with you?" So I know it's not all in my head that I have been eating better - he has noticed it too. Maybe he is coming around on all this.
Well I was going to make this a quick update and it turned into a book. I gotta get back to work.