Well I'm not sure what to blog about....I just feel the need to write something. We got a call from our local agency today may have a 7yr placed with us in the near future. That's the oldest child we would have had since starting our foster care life about 1 1/2 yrs ago. We'll see what happens with him. We have until monday to make a decision cause it's not an emergency placement.

On a different note, does anybody out there do a scrapbook or anything to send home with kids when they leave your homes? I have done this for the kids we have had so far. I haven't given G her book yet. I'm waiting to see what happens with her adoption. I don't think her birth mom would want/appreciate it. L&L just got a few pages cause they were with us for such a short time. I also do a book for us to keep. In G's book, on the final page I put the lyrics to the song..."MY WISH" by Rascal Flatts. I heard this song the day G left us and cried immediately. It is sooo perfect and says exactly what we wish for her...and any other foster child that will come into our life.

"MY WISH" BY RASCAL FLATTS

I hope the days come easy and the moments pass slow,
and each road leads you where you want to go,
and if you're faced with a choice, and you have to choose,
I hope you choose the one that means the most to you.

and if one door opens to another door closed,
I hope you keep on walkin' 'til you find the window,
if it's cold outside,
show the world the warmth of your smile,
but more than anything, more than anything,

My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
your dreams stay big, your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
and while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you,
and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.

I hope you never look back, but ya never forget,
all the ones who love you, in the place you left,
I hope you always forgive, and you never regret,
and you help somebody every chance you get,
Oh, you find God's grace, in every mistake,
and always give more then you take.
But more than anything,
Yeah, and more than anything,

My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
and while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you,
and wants the same things too,Yeah, this, is my wish.

My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
your dreams stay big, your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
and while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you,
and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.
this is my wish
i hope you know somebody loves you
may all your dreams stay big

ok -so did you cry at that one? every time I hear it I still get tears. It is just such a perfect song (in my opinion) for a child that has been thru what most foster care kids have. So let me know your thoughts....

News I'm not too sure what to do with...

Ok I just got a call from our local SS office. Our little girl foster daughter that is in the process of being adopted is not going as well as the adoptive family has hoped. The state is objecting to the adoption on many different grounds and I'm not sure how to feel about this. It has also been asked of us if we would be interested in having a relationship with G if/when the adoption goes thru. This is the hard one....do we want a relationship or not. Of course, my first instinct is to say YES!!! but will it be too hard? Afterall we've been thru? It would be like an "aunt/uncle" or special friends kind of relationship. I don't know what to do. What have your experiences with this been like? There is also the chance that our local SS office may be getting involved again too and they wanted to know if we would be willing to take her again if it came to that. That I did say yes to. This time, we know what we are getting into. There's so much more to this but it's time to head home from work so I'll finish more tomorrow....afterall - it's SURVIVOR night and I can't be late for that! :-)

Happy Valentine's Day

Happy Valentine's Day to one and all. Things are quiet in our house and we are getting a lot accomplished. I did check in with our social worker the other day and she wanted to know if we would be willing to take a 15yr old. I told her, Sorry! After all, I'm young. I'm not ready to deal with teenagers yet. Maybe 10 years from now. But not yet.

Hope everyone has a Happy day today and that you can spend it (or at least part of it) with someone you love.

Quiet Household

Well the kids have been gone for almost a week now. The nights are eery quiet around the house. I'm still feeling guilty or something. Thank you for letting me know it's normal! Hubby and I will enjoy some time together. As much as I want to be a mom full time - it really takes a toll on you to care for someone else's kids! I don't think our families realize how different it really is to be a foster parent vs a biological parent. Maybe some of you disagree too, but that's just how I feel. If a bio child acted like our little L did, who would you have to "blame" but yourself. With her, her bio mom was aiding in her behavior which was working against us. I know that someday I will be a forever mom to the right child and until that day comes, there will be many children that hopefully I can make a positive impact in their lives while they are in our home.

What a quiet weekend we had....

Well the weekend was very quiet to say the least. IT was a good quiet and yet, I found myself not knowing what to do. For the past 1 1/2 years we have had at least 1 child under the age of 5 in our home at all times. I got caught up on some much need scrapbooking though and that was nice to get done.

As for what the respite home had to say....L Jr. was good all weekend - big surprise. NOT! He's always a good little boy. They said that LAnna had a few short tantrums lasting 2 mins at the most and then she was fine. I find that extremely hard to believe especially considering they said she only napped a total of 2 hrs during the day. But then again, if she is so content at their house then maybe they need to move her there on a permanent basis??? I don't know. I'm sooo torn on this one. We have asked that she be moved and tomorrow is the deadline. I have offered to deliver her to someone tonight as I am traveling (whether permittting) up to their county tonight. We'll see what happens. Of course, last night at home she was a good girl. We only had a couple short tantrums right before bedtime. Now I'm torn - do I tell them to move her or do we just hold out for a while and see how things go? What to do...what to do....

That's it for now...thanks again to all who read!

Peaceful Weekend Ahead

Well I know nothing more about my little peanuts except that she is teething. DUH! She does have a tooth that is bad. It's soft. One of her new 1 year molars. We have an appt with a Pediatric Dentist for Feb 21 but not until then. The only thing that CC (their social services agency) is offering us at this point is for the kids to go to a respite home for the weekend. I JUMPED FOR THIS! I feel guilty cause it will be some place strange for them and I will worry, but a much needed break for us! This way, someone who has never met these children can give an unbiased opinion of how the weekend goes. I'm excited to hear what they have to say on Sunday.

This comes good also, because I am having a Pampered Chef party at my house tomorrow and now I can get my house clean! Don't get me wrong, I love being a "mom" to these kids as they come thru our house, but this little girl has been a trying experience. I know teething can be painful, but that does not explain why she can shut it off like a light switch when you pick her up.

Hope all have a good weekend. I'm off to get them from daycare and home to pack up a bag and then off to meet the parent aide. Am I a bad parent for being excited for them to be gone this weekend??? I feel guilty!

What to do????

Well we have been dealing with an extremely cranky little girl for a few weeks now. On MOnday I called the kids' social worker and was told that she was leaving for a convention for the rest of the week and that this had to wait. On Tuesday, I called the parent aide and was told to give her a blanket and pacifier (neither of which she has EVER carried around with her). I mean - she's 12 1/2 months old and you think a pacifier is going to take care of this?? Come on! I have been incontact with my social worker in my county (these kids are from a different county) and she has been wonderful trying to help me. I've spoken with a Foster Care Supervisor from the kids' county and never received a phone call back from her either. Now this is day #4 trying to get an answer. All I am asking for is a change in the visit schedule for a week or 2 to see if getting her back on a schedule for naps/eating/etc will help. I'm not saying the visit themselves are our problem - i think it's the fact that these kids have NO SCHEDULE! She was doing sooo much better before these extra visits came into the picture. They are not willing to work on a new schedule with me. I've taken her to the chiropractor this week - there was nothing wrong with her from that aspect. Today we are going to a Pediatrician to have a complete work up done. (She's been to a regular family doc the 1st week of Jan for a checkup and was to a Public Health nurse the end of the 2nd week of Jan and she was fine both of those checkups). I'm beside myself. Now I have a daycare lady who is telling me 1 week and she needs to be gone unless there is something being done to try and get her back on a schedule. What am I supposed to do??? My daycare lady has done daycare for 40 years/foster care for 30 years. She's the one they always give the drug/alcohol babies to when they come into care for the 1st time and have to go thru withdrawals. She knows how to handle kids with problems and yet we can't get a hold on what's up with L? That is what makes me feel so strongly that if we could get her back on a schedule (consistent schedule of naps/eating etc) we would be just fine. I'm being told that this is the only schedule that works for the bio mom. Well since when does the bio mom who lost her kids due to a Meth Bust for which bio mom was no where to be found and had left her kids with a bunch of drug addicts come before these kids? I just don't understand sometimes. I called up there again this morning to Social Services and I am yet to receive a call back. The message that I left stated that unless we get a diagnosis from the Doc that there is something medically wrong with L, we are giving 1 week notice that L will need to be moved by next Thurs. L. Jr can stay if they don't have a home for him, but not sister. Am I being unrealistic with this? I'm really confused at what to do and yet my hands are tied also?